Spring is Here. Time For a Fresh Start. Divorce Mediation Can Help!

Hello Again!

This is the time of year many people decide to move on after a hard winter, including an April blizzard! If you’re thinking about divorce, or separating from your significant other, divorce mediation or separation mediation can help.

You can mediate with attorneys, but mediation without attorneys is much cheaper. Here’s how it goes:

Meet with me for a free consultation
Sign an agreement to mediate with me.
Solve your problems
Move on.

Now things are not quite that simple, but I can help you if you have worked most of your separation out, or if you haven’t a clue how to start. I can help you with techniques for separating money, possessions, and how to work out schedules for children and even pets. I know what works and what doesn’t work.

If you can’t even talk without arguing, I can help you establish ground rules, meet in separate rooms temporarily and in difficult cases I can shuttle back and forth; you can even meet at different times.

I am available to meet with you at a location near where you are, and I generally meet in easier 1-2 hour sessions, not marathon “do-it-or die” sessions. You get a chance to review what you decided before you agree to anything. I will make certain you understand what you agreed to, and how it may affect you and your relationship with you ex and with the kids if you have any.

I am here to serve. Make things easier on yourself and your kids! Call me! 612 670-7980 or
507-269-9079.

Glen

Anger, Divorce Mediation, Conflict Mediation and Parenting Consulting

Hello!
This post is about anger and the fight or flight response in particular we often get when we get upset. I was at a mediation class recently, and the presenter was Michael Gregory of Michael Gregory Consulting LLC. Mr. Gregory is a former IRS agent. Mr. Gregory said that there is lots of neuroscience research these days and one of the most interesting findings is how long a fight-or-flight response can affect a person, even after you calm down. I you get the response, you have about 9 seconds to calm down before your body gets flooded with chemicals that help you fight or flee, but are not terribly helpful for people trying to have a discussion. These chemicals stay in your system for 24 hours or until the next time you go to sleep. Not helpful for divorce mediation or parenting consulting!

The upshot of the research for mediation is that once you get this response, you are going to make mediation much harder for at least the rest of the day. We all should think about this in our interactions with others, but it is especially important for those who are in mediation. If you start to get upset for more than a few seconds, often it is better to take a break and calm down than to try to stick it out in session. If it reaches 10 seconds, then break for the day, however inconvenient that might be, or at least separate the parties in different rooms for divorce mediation or parenting consulting.

More Late Winter Musings about Mediation and Parenting Consulting

Greetings from a snowy April 4!

I know on the calendar it’s spring, but with 10 inches of new snow yesterday and a temp of 8 degrees, it’s still winter in Minnesota!

It has been a hard winter, and one which tests the patience of everyone. But if you are considering an end to a relationship it is especially hard. Just when you’d like to move out and move on, the weather makes that more difficult. When the snow melts for good, I get flooded with folks wanting mediation and parenting consulting. Right now, I could get you in for mediation next week, but with calls coming in, soon I may not be able to schedule for mediation or parenting consulting as quickly.

People sometimes ask me how I can mediate or consult with couples who disagree so much. Parenting consulting is easier, because if I have to, I can make a decision and it usually works well. But mediation is trickier, so I have to use ground rules that either I have, or a couple makes up and agrees to. When couples agree on ground rules together, that is the first step toward a successful mediation.

Mediation and parenting is easier with my help. I can help folks and their kids to a better life!