Christmas and Conflict II
There are awful things about conflict during the holidays, but there are many potential benefits, if you can take advantage of the season. Both parents can have fun with the kids during break, instead of one parent being the school parent and the other being the “Disney” parent.
But what can be great for Christmas with two families is that the kids get showered with attention from both sides. It is not at all unusual for children of divorce to have two or even three Christmases. Also, if parents are apart, when the children are with a parent, that parent can be focused on the kids. When the kids are with the other parent, it is much easier to hide presents and prepare for Christmas without interruption. If parents are able to anticipate friction points early, elegant and fun solutions can be enjoyed by all. For example, parents could agree to take the children shopping for the other parent. kids and one parent can make cookies for the other parent with the favor being returned. the kids, of course, get to have tasty treats in both houses. And some of that holiday cheer might spill over into parenting cooperation the rest of the year!
Churches, too, can benefit from deposits into the “friendship” bank account. Singing Christmas carols together can synchronize hearts but did you know that people who sing together have similar breathing and heartbeat patterns? Sometimes having fun with someone you’re annoyed with can in the long run be the best contribution to conflict solutions! Happy Holidays!